Nothing Will Ever be the Same Again

Of course that's just a silly semantical trick. Once anything is it cannot be as it was again because when it was partially defines what it was. Right? But since I'm no guru, and you're not seeking enlightenment anyway, this episode is best forgotten. Please move on to the illustrations.

This is an old man, daft with power. He holds authority over all the government issued number two pencils and is not afraid to give you a very very dull one if you displease him. This is not a work of my imagination, but rather, it is TRUTH!! (The capital letters and exclamation points signify emphasis AND sincerity.)

This picture represents my relationship to my cellular telephone as well as the physical discomfort I feel in my stomach when I recall being spanked in public as a child.
This is supposed to be Carl Rove, but unfortunately does not look enough like a pig. (Carl Rove looks like a pig, and not at all like Morton Downey Jr.)
I often imagine people casually pointing at major disasters. For instance, this person is pointing out that everyone in the theater (he's in a 500 seat theater) is gushing blood from their faces.

This is the most recent example of ugly-monster-face.